Let it Flow

Last week Tony was gone for three days followed by a weekend of roofing, gathering housewares for a family whose home burned down, teaching Sunday school, laughing, talking and crying. This weekend we experienced the rolling joy of the Kingdom of God that has burst into our life and this morning we woke up tired and sore and full.

Tony and I have been on a journey that has been ongoing throughout our lives, and recently it seems the fullness of all that God has taught us is washing over us at once. All around us we hear the question being asked, even by other believers, “what is this all about?” Whether it’s life in general, Christianity or following Jesus everyone seems to be asking the question, “Why?”

We have asked this question. In fact, I can remember a night about two years ago in our living room during our church small group when I said, “What makes my life more compelling than anyone else’s? Why would anyone choose what I have chosen in following Christ?” Little did I know that this question would be the floodgate that needed to be opened in my life in order for the River of God to flow out from me onto a waiting world.

You see most of my life has been spent, like most other people in my sub-group of white, suburban, conservative America, learning to be good and do good. Most of my life it has been taught through the lens of my Christian faith, and for the most part I felt I was doing good, not just good GREAT! I am law abiding, serving, nice, and generous. We give our money and our time and we do it with a happy heart. And you know what, so do A LOT of other people, and a lot of the them don’t even know Jesus. So how is it that my life is more compelling than anyone else’s? Why would anyone want what I have? Why would anyone choose Jesus?

The answer in one simple and satisfying word is, I believe, freedom. Freedom not just for myself, but for humanity. Freedom not just from sin, but to a life that is full and satisfying and redeemed. Freedom to choose love and justice and grace. Freedom to run wild with abandon as the person I was made to be. Freedom from everything that would hold me under it’s spell. Freedom to be free!

The awesome paradox about this freedom is that it has cost me nothing and it has cost me everything. Because of the restoration power of Christ’s resurrection I am declared perfectly just in the eyes of God. I am fully free from the grip of sin, brokeness and evil and it’s mastery over me. Nothing, nothing, nothing I have done has persuaded Jesus to give me this righteousness. It is His free gift to all of humanity declaring us not guilty in the sight of a holy God. In this way, the gift of the empty tomb has cost me nothing.

I am grateful for the freedom of this new life and the gift of Jesus as King. I am willing to pay the price it costs to live inside of this freedom and newness, under the rule of the One who laid the foundations of the earth. The cost for this is everything! Everything I thought I wanted. Everything I thought I was. Everything I’m told to follow. Everything I lay down. When I surrender it all to Him I realize that these things I offer were never mine. The treasures and worries and strivings I cling to are worthless and in His glory God burns them away and replaces them with blessings I could never have imagined.

In living into this new order in my life I have laid down countless “treasures”. Control. Apathy. Judgement. Acceptance. Validation. Grief. Anxiety. Depression. I have given over my children, my home, my money, my husband, my cars, my clothes, my food, my health, my friends, my family, my time, my talents. Over and over and over again. This isn’t a one time and I’m done kind of deal, it’s a minute by minute giving over. A surrender of moments. A restoration of mind, body and soul. It’s never ending, I hope, because discovering this freedom is the most exhilarating endeavor of my life.

So, after perhaps the most intense weekend of loving others we have ever had Tony and I are feeling something we never thought: Ready! We are ready for more! Longing to pour out what Jesus is pouring in. Longing to let justice flow like a mighty river. Longing to press on, press in, and live out this amazing new dynamic.

We are so grateful, that in this season, a season of longing for our child, waiting on paperwork and governments and adoption workers we don’t have to stop living. That God has called us not just to adoption, or parenthood, or marriage, or teaching, or mothering, or working, or artistry, or homemaking. He has called us to freedom and in every moment of our lives He provides us an opportunity to be more alive. 

Orignially posted on October 6, 2014 on our youcaring site: youcaring.com/chiaramonte